I’ve been in darkness- the darkness that robs you of your life. It haunts you, it tells you there’s nothing worth living for.
It says this life is too hard. When I have to try and I don’t want to. All I wanted to do is stay wrapped up in my bed in the dark and hide from everyone and everything.
I did not like myself. I felt ugly, fat, worthless, what was my point for even being alive?! I couldn’t make a difference.
I had three reasons to wake up and even those three reasons weren’t making it as easy as it once was. I had a thick black cloud that wouldn’t leave me and I wondered would I ever feel free?
Until I decided that wasn’t a way to live. I was over here having a pity party for myself when there were others with a lot worse going on in their lives but they still managed to live. I was being selfish.
I cried out to God and said open my eyes. Help me see me how you see me.
Show me my purpose.
Be with me even when I question your truth. What is your truth God I’m so confused?
This didn’t happen quickly in the blink of an eye. It was a slow process until I started to realize that black cloud had completely faded.
I was looking forward to the day and I was ready to tackle life.
My three important reasons that kept me going needed me. they needed me to teach them the real way to live. full of sparkle, full of wonderment, full of life. Finding Gods truth in all things.
Knowing he loves us even when we question him.
Knowing we are worth more than silver and gold to him
Living free from chains and bondage.
These three human beings they are my purpose.
I’ve been in darkness and I found the light!
I don’t ever want to go back…
Be the light… Matthew 5:14
John 1:5 And the light shines in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.
John 12:35 Then Jesus said to them, Yet a little while is the light with you. Walk while you have the light, lest darkness come on you: for he that walks in darkness knows not where he goes.
What haunts you? Do you ever feel like you can’t really live? Can you reach for the light out of the darkness?
Do you know what you are worth?
#choosetoday #choosethismoment #bethelight